Been Pete Bested


Very well Known Member
Aug 5, 2005
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San Rafael, CA
I need to vent! Back in March I let my band mates know that I needed to step away for 2-4 months to find an assisted living facility for my 88yo mom with vascular dementia who has been living with my wife and I. It's been a very very stressful time for my family. I gave them the option to replace me, but they refused, and insisted they would get a fill in for a number of gigs. I was thrilled. A few days ago I told them I would be ready to come back anytime in the next month. You guessed it: I get an email saying that they are keeping the replacement guy because he quit one of his other bands and committed to gig with them for the rest of the year. My 15 years clearly meant zero. Obviously they told him at least a year so they lied to me, then screwed me. You assume band mates are friends but that was clearly a huge mistake. Not even the guts to telll me in person.


DFO Master
Aug 12, 2020
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Roxana, IL
This is disrespectful at best and gutless at the worst.

They could have told you beforehand that they were staying with the sub. But that would mean that they were honorable.

Too many people think that “sparing” people and having no confrontation is the way to make a difficult action, but it is just dishonest, disingenuous and disgusting to not face the person they have fired, ESPECIALLY since you gave them the out originally.

May a pox be upon their house and may they be booed from the stage in disgrace and their reputation be marred.