Been Pete Bested

richardh253

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Sorry to hear! It's beyond me how people do such things over e-mail. While the Fab3 ducked Pete, they at least had Brian Epstein meet him in person. I know there was no e-mail then but it could have been thru the post (= mail in England. That your band didn't have the decency to meet in person makes their actions doubly bad.

Don't people get it's all about relationships? That business counts, but it's not the default bottom line? That people matter?

What we know is....years from now when they look back on how they behaved, and you look back on how you behaved, you'll have nothing to be ashamed of. And they will have a lot of regret, if they have any decency. Very different stories to tell the grandchildren.

And not a very nice set of maneuvers by the other drummer, either.

At least you can look at yourself in the mirror.

Good luck moving forward!
 

MBB

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Sorry to hear! It's beyond me how people do such things over e-mail. While the Fab3 ducked Pete, they at least had Brian Epstein meet him in person. I know there was no e-mail then but it could have been thru the post (= mail in England. That your band didn't have the decency to meet in person makes their actions doubly bad.

Don't people get it's all about relationships? That business counts, but it's not the default bottom line? That people matter?

What we know is....years from now when they look back on how they behaved, and you look back on how you behaved, you'll have nothing to be ashamed of. And they will have a lot of regret, if they have any decency. Very different stories to tell the grandchildren.

And not a very nice set of maneuvers by the other drummer, either.

At least you can look at yourself in the mirror.

Good luck moving forward!
Well said. Karma will eventually take care of them. They got an extremely harsh and brutally honest email about how they acted. I burned those bridges with glee.
And thanks to all who replied with great advice and comments. It really does help me get this out of my system. I will not look back and I WILL find better musicians and people to play music with.
 

Malc

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Many,many moons ago I was dumped by my so called mates from the first band I'd ever been in.
To be fair, they told me to my face but stated it was due to my image, as it was a punky band and I looked like a metal head at the time and didn't want to cut my hair.
Fast forward 4 months and the bass player sheepishly asks if I'd come back as their new guy,who looked the part, sucked at drumming!
It was a good feeling to be able to politely decline the offer as I'd found a band who didn't care what I looked like and one that I played with for the next 6 years.
It may not feel like it at the moment but you might just find something better awaits.
 

DanRH

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Coming from someone who’s had four marriages, thank them for allowing you to grow. Had my three previous not gone down that road (they cheated on me when I was gigging), I would’ve never met my real soulmate. I know we’re talking about a band but you get my reference.

You did the right thing with your family.
 
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RIDDIM

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I'm sorry this happened to you.

When someone shows us who they are, we should believe them the first time.
 

p83

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you KNOW that in the near future, the new guy will have a situation and they will call you to fill in...........................................
 

Houndog

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Wait a minute , Pete Best didn’t take time off for family issue , he just plain got fired .
 

drumflyer

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Get this printed on th back of a T-shirt, go to their gig and stand in front of the stage
B6E5AF5D-33E8-4D48-99D7-D6B53E7A565E.jpeg
 

coastie

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If you’re in this deal long enough, this is bound to happen. Drummers do take a bit of heat when things don’t go the way they should tempo wise. Many of us get the sack just for that but that’s not the case here.
You can certainly hold your head high knowing you did the right thing by your loved one. No band is worth turning you back on loved ones.
There’s a new gig out there for you and it may be time for you to go find it.
 

yetanotherdrummer

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I was on the other side of this years ago. A band I knew need a drummer after their long time drummer broke his leg. It turned out that they liked my drumming better, so when their original drummer was healed up, he wasn't invited back into the band.

The original drummer told me he was OK with it, but I always felt bad about it. I ended up playing with this band off and on for 5 or 6 years. I don't know if their original drummer ever re-joined the band. Heck, most of the guys in the band have passed away, as they were all much older than me.
 


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