Etiquette

FlamTap

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Recently did a gig where the opening band asked about using my kit.... we had set up early and did sound check, they showed up a couple hours later. Other band was playing 30 minutes, so of course I'm gonna do it, it'd be easier for everyone (both bands, other drummer, sound guy). I've done this plenty of times with mixed results, normally guys leave everything as is and they do fine. This guy completely changed the setup, tuned every drum insanely high pitch, overtightened wing nuts, and pretty much beat the living crap outta the kit, then high fives the other guys in the band as he leaps from the stage, without even attempting to return any of it to its original position. He did manage to come back up and ask for the shot of Fireball he'd left sitting on the monitor. Then, I've got a 3 hour gig on drums that sound like timbales unless I sit there and retune everything. No good deed, right?
 

mkelley

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I'll use a backline kit and don't worry about it but if it's someone else's I usually pass...honestly since I like how I tune drums and don't like all the muffling and stuff other people pop on their heads.

Sometimes I let a few people use my kit but the rules are almost always, bring your cymbals and help me load-in and out. Learned a lot of lessons in my younger years to be stingy about my stuff.
 

RogersLudwig

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I once let someone use my kit as they were sandwiched in between our two sets. She got really pissed when she found out I had memory locks on all of the cymbal stands, tom mount, and the floor tom legs. I had to laugh, but aint no way I'd do this again.

I did show up to a gig a couple of years ago and found out our band leader told the drummer in the opening act he could use my set. The leader and I had a serious talk about that and I told him I'd walk out if he did it again. Luckily I knew the other fellow. Nice guy who doesn't bash. both acts are pretty low key jazz groups. However, once he found out I was an archaeologist, he hounded me to show his granddaughter some arch sites to pique her interest. I said fine, but then he stipulated I had to do it on a Saturday, my day off from being a full time archaeologist. I haven't bothered to follow up on that one. Some people have no idea when they're asking too much
 
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backtodrum

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I've done it once and swore never again. The idiot dented every head on my set and it cost me $150 bucks to fix that problem. I sat there the whole time he played cringing that he was going to crack my cymbals. It was a painful lesson that I will never make again. I called him out for denting my heads and he just shrugged it off and walked away with not so much as an apology. I was fuming to say the least!
 

gbow

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Yep, people! Geez..

I like working hard on my drumming. But I try to always keep it in perspective, the world doesn't need another great drummer, but it can always use another great person.

Unfortunately many people don't follow this advice, or even try. We all make mistakes, try to recognize them and learn from them.

gabo
 

notINtheband

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A few years ago I was invited to the monthly Blues Jam in a neighboring county.
The same players set up once a month and it’s open to any and all musicians. Basic setup of a drum kit, amps, mics.
You sign up when you enter and every third song one player is switched out from bass, or guitar, or drums, or vocals so it’s an always evolving mix. You may play song one with a group but the next song will have a different bassist, then the next a different guitarist, etc. repeat.
Songs are agreed upon by whomever calls them out so that everybody has a say in what you jam on, which is mostly blues based classic stuff most players know.
But the downside was the drums.
Oh they were excellent quality, cymbals as well, but their owner who was a local drummer, sat beside the stage and evil-eyes each and every drummer who had a turn. You could feel his uncomfortable rage as each drummer took the throne and played 3 songs.
There were zero hard hitters but his demeanor made it feel like he was watching someone assault his family. I have no idea why he would offer his kit up if he felt this way, but it became clear it was so he could always play his own kit at this community jam.
If a drummer brought their own sticks he would check to make sure they weren’t nylon tipped (please don’t use those, they leave marks on my vintage cymbals).
It was the oddest and most uncomfortable thing I’ve ever performed at and I never went back. As we left I heard another member apologizing to the other drummers that “so-and-so” the drummer kept a rod up his rear all night regarding his drums.
I mean, I even get his feelings, but then, why…. Ugh.
 

cworrick

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You were set up and even did a soundcheck. The soundcheck was done with the drums at YOUR tuning to match up the best with the room. This idiot had no business retuning the drums to his "personal" taste.
As for adjusting things... FIRST ASK. Second, ASK. I'm a little on the shorter side and if the kit owner is some 7ft something, I obviously am going to need to lower a few things. But I communicate this with the drum owner AND help him move things back to where they were.
 

Squirrel Man

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When I was gigging a while back I generally always played the other bands kit, why lug mine all over the place? We were usually the opener act anyway.

I never messed with the other kit, played it as-is (maybe adjusted seat and snare height). Mostly out of courtesy to the other guy for letting me use his kit and that wasn't easy most times.

Like here, toms are ridiculously tilted inward (for me), still played them.

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Polska

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I've shared mine too in the past, mostly with good results. The last time though, the drummer used his own snare (great) but I'm watching him play and he is rocking his legs, pushing the snare into my mounted tom. Wrap finish, and not a brand new kit, but still - there was a noticeable rash on the tom. It could have been much worse, and it doesn't bother me as much as I thought it would since it's inward facing, but still. How do you not know that you are slamming your snare into my tom, and why doesn't that bother you? Etiquette is the PERFECT title for this thread. Some people are aware...others....
 
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Tornado

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A few years ago I was invited to the monthly Blues Jam in a neighboring county.
The same players set up once a month and it’s open to any and all musicians. Basic setup of a drum kit, amps, mics.
You sign up when you enter and every third song one player is switched out from bass, or guitar, or drums, or vocals so it’s an always evolving mix. You may play song one with a group but the next song will have a different bassist, then the next a different guitarist, etc. repeat.
Songs are agreed upon by whomever calls them out so that everybody has a say in what you jam on, which is mostly blues based classic stuff most players know.
But the downside was the drums.
Oh they were excellent quality, cymbals as well, but their owner who was a local drummer, sat beside the stage and evil-eyes each and every drummer who had a turn. You could feel his uncomfortable rage as each drummer took the throne and played 3 songs.
There were zero hard hitters but his demeanor made it feel like he was watching someone assault his family. I have no idea why he would offer his kit up if he felt this way, but it became clear it was so he could always play his own kit at this community jam.
If a drummer brought their own sticks he would check to make sure they weren’t nylon tipped (please don’t use those, they leave marks on my vintage cymbals).
It was the oddest and most uncomfortable thing I’ve ever performed at and I never went back. As we left I heard another member apologizing to the other drummers that “so-and-so” the drummer kept a rod up his rear all night regarding his drums.
I mean, I even get his feelings, but then, why…. Ugh.
Good chance that drummer only owned this one kit. One of the groups I'm involved with may start hosting an open mic next month. If we do it, I expect to back up singers and such, not too many drummers, but I don't know. But since I don't know, I'm seriously thinking about picking up a cheap Pearl Export or something to be a sacrificial kit. Which would bring my total number of kits to four...never thought I'd actually need this many drum sets...
 

Formula 602

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I let a guy sit in once,and he didn’t like where I positioned the snare..so..flipped it around a bit,putting a snare arm through the bottom head.....I was a little pissed..when I went back up to play!
 

wflkurt

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Man quite the horror stories here. I have let it happen a few times too and it has generally not ever been pleasant. On the flip side, I have been the guy that used someone else's set and I always have my own snare and generally a seat as I like to sit high. I don't mess with anything on someone else's set as I find that to be pretty rude.

My biggest concern with anyone using my stuff is how they hit the cymbals. It blows my mind how so people just hit cymbals the wrong way. My Paiste Giant beats are way too expensive to let some hack smash away at them.
 

notINtheband

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Man quite the horror stories here. I have let it happen a few times too and it has generally not ever been pleasant. On the flip side, I have been the guy that used someone else's set and I always have my own snare and generally a seat as I like to sit high. I don't mess with anything on someone else's set as I find that to be pretty rude.

My biggest concern with anyone using my stuff is how they hit the cymbals. It blows my mind how so people just hit cymbals the wrong way. My Paiste Giant beats are way too expensive to let some hack smash away at them.
Agreed. I have a buddy who drums for another local band. He is a pure caveman on the drums. Hulk Smash with every hit. He has broken Ride cymbals! To his credit, I have played gigs where both our bands have played and in one instance his was the shared kit, and he was not at all concerned about anyone hurting his equipment. He freely admitted nobody could hit them harder than he did. And he was right.
 


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