Etiquette

HoorayGuy

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A couple of years ago when I was in the house band at a local jam, a guy sitting in broke TWO of my heads in one song. This was a JAZZ jam. He just walked off like it was nothing.
Yeah, I'm seeing a pattern here. The primo donnas think they are above etiquette.
 

drumflyer

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I wouldn’t let someone use my kit unless they were a pro, or I had heard and seen the individual play.
 

CaptainCrunch

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Dude breaks something replaceable, he'd better have cash. If he doesn't tell him it's a good thing you happen to have makeup and a wig, and then all of a sudden he'll magically find some cash.

The list of people I'd let use the irreplaceable stuff is shorter than the list of people I'd lend money to.
 

DavedrumsTX

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Recently did a gig where the opening band asked about using my kit.... we had set up early and did sound check, they showed up a couple hours later. Other band was playing 30 minutes, so of course I'm gonna do it, it'd be easier for everyone (both bands, other drummer, sound guy). I've done this plenty of times with mixed results, normally guys leave everything as is and they do fine. This guy completely changed the setup, tuned every drum insanely high pitch, overtightened wing nuts, and pretty much beat the living crap outta the kit, then high fives the other guys in the band as he leaps from the stage, without even attempting to return any of it to its original position. He did manage to come back up and ask for the shot of Fireball he'd left sitting on the monitor. Then, I've got a 3 hour gig on drums that sound like timbales unless I sit there and retune everything. No good deed, right?
Some folks are clueless and have no class. I have experienced some similar things. My answer now is a polite “I’m sorry, but I have been burned several times before and I can’t.”
 

jeffhowe

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My rules for kit sharing: Bring your own snare and snare stand, cymbals, sticks. Do not change anything! No switching my pedal for your double bass pedal, no changing heights of throne, cymbal stands, etc.
Even with all these rules, there are guys who will do whatever they want. These guys go on "the list"!;)
 

FrankF

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Recently did a gig where the opening band asked about using my kit.... we had set up early and did sound check, they showed up a couple hours later. Other band was playing 30 minutes, so of course I'm gonna do it, it'd be easier for everyone (both bands, other drummer, sound guy). I've done this plenty of times with mixed results, normally guys leave everything as is and they do fine. This guy completely changed the setup, tuned every drum insanely high pitch, overtightened wing nuts, and pretty much beat the living crap outta the kit, then high fives the other guys in the band as he leaps from the stage, without even attempting to return any of it to its original position. He did manage to come back up and ask for the shot of Fireball he'd left sitting on the monitor. Then, I've got a 3 hour gig on drums that sound like timbales unless I sit there and retune everything. No good deed, right?
There are a few things here that shows you and your band mates care about your performance and your audience. One you were there with plenty of time to setup and sound check BEFORE your scheduled showtime. Now, you were kind enough to let a Fellow drummer (I use that term loosely) use your kit, great on your part! However, what he did is appalling and I would have been royally pissed! If you can’t get to job with ample time to set up with your own stuff then stay home! Now, in your case if I was the the other drummer, 1) I would never have changed any tuning and or setup. I don’t care what the circumstances are. I’m using someone else kit that they were KIND ENOUGH to let me use. 2) having the nerve to ask for his shot would have really pushed me over the edge. I surely hop the gig turned out okay for you. I just don’t see how someone would do this.
 

Derrick

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I played with a drummer once who was not very consistent in his playing, and his tuning was just a habitual quick tightening of arbitrary lugs before he would start. He would use my kit for recording, and I told him that I would tune it before hand so it would be ready for a session. The day of, I spent a good hour plus, tuning it back to something making sense and that would sound good for the mics (typically medium-low on this oversize kit). When he arrived, the first thing I told him was that I had spent over an hour tuning it and got it all ready to go (which we had already discussed and planned). I went to patch some cables at the mix desk, and heard the familiar sound of the drum key clanking on the lugs... Like habit, he went to town cranking away on them. He didn't even listen first! I ran over and got pretty upset, yelling at him in disbelief for doing that after discussing, planning, then just then telling him the time I had spent. It lacked any logic and felt disrespectful...
 

Dtucci

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I just recently did a 180 on this. I was always the guy volunteering my kit for opening acts when we were headlining or on any multi-band bill, until two weeks ago. I was helping a buddy launch his new band at a club where we have been in residency for over 20 yrs. To increase the chances of holding some of their crowd over, I thought keeping my kit up there would cut down on change-over. The drummer was a nice enough guy, but I should have seen the yellow flag when he didn't personally reach out to me at all before the event, even though I made sure my buddy passed on my contact info. All he brought were his own sticks. I have never shown up to play on a backline (or anyone else's) kit without my own kick pedal, snare and cymbals. Maybe it's an inverse age to tolerance ratio, but I am officially OVER IT. Every time the guy hit one of my crashes, I cringed. No more Mr. Nice Guy. Bring your own gear. Strike it quickly and get it into your truck, immediately. GET OFF MY LAWN!
 
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Living Dead Drummer

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If another band on the bills wants to share backline I am more than accommodating, as long as it's discussed well in advance. As in more than 24 hours in advance. Of course I insist they bring their own pedals, snare, and cymbals at a minimum.

However if a band shows up late, and asked to use my gear at the show, I will (and have) told them to leave.
Showing up late is a good way to get under my skin. Asking to use my gear at the venue without any prior discussion is a hard NO, and I will not be polite about it.

Here's a nice little article I wrote for Music Connection Magazine about stage etiquette. It doesn't cover the sharing of gear, but some may find my opinions interesting.

Music Connection: Know Your Stage Etiquette
 

SplineSpider

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Wow! Could that guy have done anything extra to be more of a jerk? Reputation follow you around like a shadow. He won't get away with that many times before no one wants to do him any favors.
 

HoorayGuy

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Be polite & cordial, but, don't be nice. Sad fact of life. Some people take kindness as a weakness.
 

michaelocalypse

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I've had to borrow kits before. I generally take the "deal with what's there" mindset. If it's extremely uncomfortable, I'll just do the basics to get through. But then again, there are people out there who think it's all about them, and the world needs to bend to their will.
 

Houndog

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If another band on the bills wants to share backline I am more than accommodating, as long as it's discussed well in advance. As in more than 24 hours in advance. Of course I insist they bring their own pedals, snare, and cymbals at a minimum.

However if a band shows up late, and asked to use my gear at the show, I will (and have) told them to leave.
Showing up late is a good way to get under my skin. Asking to use my gear at the venue without any prior discussion is a hard NO, and I will not be polite about it.

Here's a nice little article I wrote for Music Connection Magazine about stage etiquette. It doesn't cover the sharing of gear, but some may find my opinions interesting.

Music Connection: Know Your Stage Etiquette
Good article !!!
 

JazzDrumGuy

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I don't touch another's kit if using it. Just adjust the throne position. On a few backline festival kits, I have adjusted the tuning of a snare and moved a ride or cymbal/hats if needed.

I had a gig using my vintage SSB bop kit and the band after me was a high school rock band. I let the guy use my kit. No problems. He was courteous and when I told him the kit was vintage so take it easy, he got it. They jammed and sounded great. I retuned the bass to give him some low end and it worked.
 

aindiparse

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Recently did a gig where the opening band asked about using my kit.... we had set up early and did sound check, they showed up a couple hours later. Other band was playing 30 minutes, so of course I'm gonna do it, it'd be easier for everyone (both bands, other drummer, sound guy). I've done this plenty of times with mixed results, normally guys leave everything as is and they do fine. This guy completely changed the setup, tuned every drum insanely high pitch, overtightened wing nuts, and pretty much beat the living crap outta the kit, then high fives the other guys in the band as he leaps from the stage, without even attempting to return any of it to its original position. He did manage to come back up and ask for the shot of Fireball he'd left sitting on the monitor. Then, I've got a 3 hour gig on drums that sound like timbales unless I sit there and retune everything. No good deed, right?
Yes, in situations like this it is easier on everyone to be cooperative. I would have done the same. But I always advise the drummer who is using my gear, "Don't change A THING - seat height, tom angles, cymbal heights/angles, nothing! You can use your own seat, cymbals, snare etc if you have them. But the physical set up (and tuning) of the kit don't get touched." I've been told I have an intimidating demeanor (I don't think so), and it always works. If there is something that they absolutely can't work with, they will then come and ask me if they can change it, and I always politely allow them to, grateful that they've told me. You really had some bad luck with the guy changing your tuning. That is just NEVER done! They only time I ever alter the tuning of a kit, is a supplied kit at a jazz festival, and them only minimally.
 

hawker

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Geez guys what’s the big deal about not letting a person adjust anything ?
You can’t put it back ???
If they adjust something then THEY should adjust it back...except they never can and sometimes don't even try. Now the band is getting antsy waiting for you adjust everything while they twiddle their thumbs, the club owner gets ticked off and the audience is getting bored waiting. Buddy Rich used to insist that anyone who played his drums....even at his invitation, had to play them, "As they are". "As they are".
 

hsosdrum

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If they adjust something then THEY should adjust it back...except they never can and sometimes don't even try. Now the band is getting antsy waiting for you adjust everything while they twiddle their thumbs, the club owner gets ticked off and the audience is getting bored waiting. Buddy Rich used to insist that anyone who played his drums....even at his invitation, had to play them, "As they are". "As they are".
When I was 15 I got to meet Buddy backstage at a TV show taping. His drums were nearby on a wheeled riser and on my way out I asked if I could sit behind them, just to see how his setup felt. He said "Sure, but don't play them, they want to keep the studio quiet." I wouldn't have dreamed of playing them, but I learned a helluva lot about drumset ergonomics just from sitting behind them. He and I were the same height and his setup fit me perfectly; everything in it was in an ideal position to be reached with minimum effort and maximum comfort. I wouldn't have needed to change a single thing to play it.
 

vedivid

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I'll use a backline kit and don't worry about it but if it's someone else's I usually pass...honestly since I like how I tune drums and don't like all the muffling and stuff other people pop on their heads. (Mod edit)
 
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