Here's my "My band broke up, and boy, am I bummed" thread.

bellbrass

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I've been playing with these guys for 16 years; the guitarist and bass player for even longer. The singer has been trying to recover from an injury that prevents him from singing, and it has been over a year since we've played out live. I've had some conversations with the other guys, and it really looks like it's over.
We were a really good band, and I can't believe it's over..but all good things come to an end.
I don't even know where to go from here...I looked on Band Mix, but sheesh....the last time I tried to put a band together, you made paper notices and put them on the bulletin board in music stores.
I feel like a divorcee who's trying to get back in the dating game.
 

Mcjnic

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Hahahahaha
Love the paper notices on the bulletin board reference. Made me laugh.

Well ... you’ve got a great attitude. Life is divided up into chapters.
As you start this one, take plenty of pictures. People like well illustrated books.
I wish you the absolute best knowing good things are just up ahead.
 

bellbrass

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Hahahahaha
Love the paper notices on the bulletin board reference. Made me laugh.

Well ... you’ve got a great attitude. Life is divided up into chapters.
As you start this one, take plenty of pictures. People like well illustrated books.
I wish you the absolute best knowing good things are just up ahead.
Thanks for the supportive words. I took a ton of pics of my band, and had planned on showing them on a screen at our last gig. I had no idea the singer was going to be injured, of course.
 

On the one

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Can anyone else play and sing? That can be an option or maybe do jam sessions put a ad on Craigslist, Facebook, etc. Lastly maybe find a temporary singer until your singer is completely healed or feel healthy enough to sing...
 

bellbrass

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Can anyone else play and sing? That can be an option or maybe do jam sessions put a ad on Craigslist, Facebook, etc. Lastly maybe find a temporary singer until your singer is completely healed or feel healthy enough to sing...
Forgot to mention that the guitarist is basically done with bands...at least for the time being. Also, the bass player has two side bands, now moved to main bands. He is busy and doesn't care if this band reunites. It's basically just me right now who wants to carry on in a new direction.
 
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Treviso1

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I am in a similar situation right now. It was much easier to put a band together when I was 18 years old. Good luck!
 

mcjaco

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My last band had an acrimonious break up. The Guitar/Singer was upset that the bass player and I had a side project. We played an event where the band played, and then the side project played after. He was a total PITA the entire evening. We hadn't played together in a few months, and we were rusty as a unit. The bass player and I were sharp, because of the side project keeping us active. The guitar player kept missing transitions, botching solos, and cutting songs short. With three songs left, he just stopped playing in a song, and let the bass player and I out to dry. I looked at at him and told him to knock it off. He told me to "F off," grabbed his stuff, and left. We haven't talked since.

That band played to an empty room the entire three hours. The side project.....arses to elbows the rest of the night. I haven't looked back once.

That being said, the side project doesn't get booked much, so I'm kind of in the mode of do I want to keep doing this? My gear sits in a corner of the basement unused except for three to four times a year, and I'm not sure I would miss it, if I sold it off. I still have a e-kit to mess around with if I felt like it.
 

pwc1141

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While I have been in bands (short-lived, most of them) , most of my life I have been an independent drummer for hire and that has suited me. I get to play with lots of guys who are in the circuit and who mix and match trios or quartets as needed. Playing jazz and Latin mainly from the "Real Book" it is easy to do this. No rehearsals, stay with the tune's form, count it in and off we go. Every night is different even some of the tunes aren't......There is a lot to be said for being "freelance" this way.
 

Houndog

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Took me 2 years to find a new band .
I turned down a few though , they had no interest in originals . I didn’t start playing music to play BTO at the VFW .
 

wflkurt

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I know exactly how you feel. My main band has had more ups and downs then anything I can remember. We have a male and female singer and the male singer has been dealing with bladder cancer the last two years. It really threw a wrench into things as we had a great thing going with tons of good gigs and a nice mix of covers and original songs that he wrote. From late 2011(when I joined the band) until the start of 2018 it has been amazing. At the start of 2018 it turned into a crap show. My 2018 gigging year was the worst year of gigging I have ever has in almost 30 years of playing music out. The band is still together but all the gigs we have done this year have been without the male singer. it has surprisingly worked out pretty good but we all still miss him being there.

I vowed at the start of 2019 that I would put myself out there and look for other things to do. I had some false starts and was feeling pretty lost in today's music world. I'm certainly not quitting my day job anytime soon but from about June up to present I have been quite busy this summer playing with a lot of different people. It certainly gave me some confidence I was lacking. It feels so odd to say that as I have been doing this so long but I was literally feeling out of the loop and was getting fairly depressed trying to find musicians and start from scratch. After the many cool things and great shows my main band has done, going back to square one sucked. It's like being in a bad game of chutes and ladders and I got sent down the biggest ladder.

My point is that if you really want to get back out there it may take time and you just have to network and let people know you are available. I have spent many years as a musician being committed to whatever band I was in at the time. This time I am trying to do what is best for me and so far it seems to be working out. I have to really stay on top of my calendar so I have an old school one I write in as well as one on my iphone. Good luck to you moving forward.
 

shuffle

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Took me 2 years to find a new band .
I turned down a few though , they had no interest in originals . I didn’t start playing music to play BTO at the VFW .
Its as easy as fishin,you can be a musician!
Hated that line,thanks BTO!
Really,give yourself some time.
 

Houndog

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My stubbornness paid off , I feel like I’m in one of the best bands in the region now , just did our 1st gig and it went extremely well ....
 

singleordoubleheads

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I feel that would be disrespectful.
If the band had broken up, or had members quite acrimoniously, then yes. But this is a legacy member who can no longer sing (at least for now).
I kind of disagree--I guess it's easy for ME since I obviously don't know the people, but it seems kind of selfish for one person to cause the rest of the band to quit playing, esp if everyone else wants to keep going. If I was the one who HAD to stop playing, I would tell everyone else to keep going strong!!
 

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